Note: This is one of those topics I find interesting. I’m not an expert by any means.
In an age dominated by social media likes and follows, many creatives find themselves chasing approval rather than pursuing authentic expression. Photographers, for instance, often measure the worth of their work by the number of likes or comments it receives. When a photograph fails to perform well on Instagram, it can lead to feelings of disappointment and demotivation. This phenomenon is not confined to photography alone; it reflects a broader cultural shift toward external validation. People have become hooked on social approval, and this dependency can negatively impact ones success.
I believe that we should engage in activities purely for the enjoyment of doing so, regardless of whether others approve. I have come to realise that when we focus on doing things for ourselves, we are often more successful in those endeavours. I recently stumbled across some research that linked this belief and helped me understand why some goals are best kept private.
Private Goals and Personal Fulfilment
I never really noticed my goal setting, but I realised that I do. In doing so, I’ve noticed a pattern: I tend not to share certain ambitions with others. When I started my blog several years ago, I told no one. I wrote for myself, without an audience in mind. This tendency to keep goals private intrigued me. Why do I feel it is important to keep some goals private while openly sharing others? And how does this relate to the idea of doing things for ourself, and nobody else?
Personal vs Performance Goals
I realised that the goals I set tend to fall into two broad categories: personal and performance. Personal goals are often creative, vulnerable, and identity-driven. They are typically pursued for internal reasons and are best kept private. Performance goals, on the other hand, are structured, socially recognised, and benefit from external accountability.
For example, starting a blog was a personal goal. It involved creativity and exposed me to criticism I was not equipped to deal with. In contrast, learning French was a performance goal. It’s socially respected, clearly defined, and well-suited to public commitment, people might even think it’s cool. Similarly, when I began my Master’s degree in Environmental Management, I shared that goal widely. But the blog remained private.
This distinction helped me understand why some goals thrive in privacy. Personal goals, by their nature, are more susceptible to the distorting effects of social validation. They require a protected space to grow.
The Psychology of Public Intentions
This insight was reinforced by a study conducted by Peter Gollwitzer and colleagues, which examined the effects of publicly declaring personal goals. The researchers found that when individuals shared their intentions, they were less likely to keep up with it. In several experiments, participants who believed their goals had been acknowledged by others showed reduced motivation to act on them. The act of sharing created a premature sense of accomplishment, which diminished the motivation necessary for sustained effort.
This phenomenon aligns with Kurt Lewin’s field theory, which suggests that behavior is driven by tensions within a person’s psychological field (their environment). When a goal is set, it creates a tension that motivates action and sharing that goal can release that tension prematurely, simulating progress and reducing the drive to achieve. In contrast, keeping the goal private preserves the tension and sustains motivation.
Reclaiming Joy Through Intrinsic Motivation
These findings have huge implications for how we approach our creative and personal pursuits. They suggest that we should be cautious about sharing goals too early, especially those that are deeply personal. More importantly, they affirm the value of doing things for ourselves, without seeking external validation. Put another way, go out there and do something for you, keep it to you, and you might find that you keep it up and develop more than you anticipated.
Whether it’s photography, writing, or learning something new, the most meaningful goals are often the ones we pursue quietly. They are nurtured in solitude, free from the pressures of performance and approval.
In a world that constantly urges us to share, perform, and seek applause, choosing to do something for its own sake is a radical act. It is a return to authenticity, a reminder that the deepest satisfaction comes not from being seen, but from being true to ourselves.